“The Lord who made you, who formed you in the womb and will help you,” (Is. 44:2). This is true in my life. I was born and brought up in a simple and small family in Tamil Nadu, Southern India. My father (now deceased) was in the military and mother is a house wife. I have an elder sister.

The selfless service of my mother and the sacrificial life of my father inspired me to be like them from my childhood. My vocation was started by their inspiration. They were my first formators. My family was the first formation house. The values which I leaned from them are my basis to dedicate myself in the Church. The simple life of my parents helped me to live as a person to be contented with what I have.

My second inspiration was the life of St. Francis of Assisi (1181-1226). I was inspired by his lifestyle. Through he was rich; he renounced everything for the sake of Christ. I am proud to say that I also belong to the family of Franciscan Missionaries of Mary (FMM).

“You did not choose me but I chose you” (John 15:16). Really I did not choose the Congregation, only God chose me through the inspiration of my spiritual director, enabling me to consecrate my life for the sake of Christ. I experienced the love of God, who chose me. I love my vocation and I am happy in my Religious life.

Pearl in a shell

Religious life is beautiful and precious as a pearl in a shell. In the beginning, I did not understand it but I tried to understand the meaning of this life in due course of time. It is not easy but with the help of God I realized it, because my joys, sorrows and difficulties made me to become deeply aware of myself. When I looked at others, I did not learn anything. I carried negativism, but when I started to look at myself and count my blessings, I started to grow positively. I surrendered to God as I am with my weakness and limitations. I opened to the spirit to allow and to act in my life.

Because of this conviction, God did not forsake me because he had called me to follow Him. The positive vibration, positive thoughts, joys, love, and concern towards others made me to develop my values and to be a happy person. Sometimes certain experiences purify and teach us lessons for life. This I have experienced in my Religious life. When I faced up my obstacles, my life changed for better, and I really experienced the inner joy in my life. I am cherishing and growing in this aspect. I am nothing; everything is in the hands of God. I trust in Him. Things and persons will come and go but He will remain forever.

The life will go on, only the values will remain. All values contain in Jesus. Love is essential and foundation of Religious life. Unless I have real love I may not experience the love of God. This love I experienced when I started to love as a nun, friend and teacher.

One among them

I never focused on any particular mission but I am ready to do different mission: the mission with people, parents and children. When I am with parents, I am one among them; when I am with people, I am one among them; when I am with children, I am one among them. This is my mission. I become as they are.

I never gave anything to them, but only I have given my presence, my love and kind words. When a child is weak, I never discouraged it. I make him/her participate in a given task so that it can perform better and feel the warmth of my love. With positive outlook, I can create and acknowledge goodness in others. I am happy and contended in my mission.

I am grateful to God, parents, teachers, friends, children and congregation who help me to grow and to become a new person in my consecrated life.

Perfect joy

When I give up my ego, misunderstanding, stubbornness, and dislike, I become a new person and I am happy. The new changes which I experience in my life give me perfect joy.

Challenges

My vocation is to be a nun in society does face challenges. Being in a community and living with different persons, cultural, linguistic and ethnic backgrounds need lots of courage to adjust and appreciate each other. Each one has different apostolate in the community, school and parish. I do balance my prayer life and mission. I relate with people with patience, prudence and gentleness. Above all, I have no hesitation to mingle with people in society. I am one among them.

Whatever I do any service I do it with love and learn from it. I like to be free and also I make others feel free with me. The real love makes me feel free enabling me to be a person of love and also a person with positive energy, which is why I am not discouraged with myself. I experience God’s love when I share this value with others. I firmly believe that God strengthens me to face challenges and to be a new person.

Despite all these challenges that the world offers me, I do cling to Christ who is the way, truth and life. Considering the world as it is and experiencing God’s grace in all these events and situations, I find my joy in Christ alone. He says, “My grace is sufficient for you” (2 Cor 12:9).

Every day I have to rediscover my life: recommitting myself through my dedication by facing challenges of the time. In spite of all the challenges, consequence, rejections, and misunderstanding, finally being a fool for Christ’s sake, I radiate joy to God’s people in and through my service to the humanity believing that Christ alone matters and thus I become person consecrated to God with full freedom experiencing the perfect joy of Christ in my total dedication with love to God who called me and consecrated me.

Thus, my consecrated life becomes meaningful and fruitful. Once I feel that my life is meaningful and relevant for the Lord, I experience contentment in the person of Christ and say with St. John, “He [Christ] must increase and I must decrease” (John 3:30). Thus realization would lead me to commit myself totally by keeping the world behind and the cross of Jesus in my heart with courage, hope and trust in Him to carry out my mission.

In my view, a consecrated person is called to become person of quality, committed, optimistic, selfless, enthusiastic, compassionate, radical, affirmative, trustworthy, energetic, and dedicated.

The source of consecrated life is a radical discipleship to follow Jesus which is based on deep faith and commitment. We are called upon to be a sign and instrument of communion with God and of unity among all. We are called upon to be a witness to a life of total dedication, lived in its fullness with joy, being a person of the Church, to continue creating God’s kingdom alive with the radiance of my joy of being a consecrated person.

We need to look at our life seriously realizing the meaning, importance and responsibility of our consecration. It is God who consecrates us by choosing us as His own to “set apart” for Himself. That means nothing else matters much except Him and His will. His plan and purpose for choosing us is to be prophetic witnesses to point out to God and to reveal God, His existence and presence to the people. When people can experience God, in same way to some extent, then we become prophetic witnesses, who are courageous, not afraid of the consequence, who did what they were told to do by God. Likewise, we too are expected to find out God’s will and carrying out it in our everyday lives.

Whenever and wherever we come across a conflict we need to reach out and try to make peace for which we have to come out for peripheries, our comfort zones, and be available in service.

People of today are asking us not so much for any material help, but to see God, His presence and His work in and through our daily life, in our dealing, loving, and merciful, compassionate attitudes to people and to God.

(Sr. A. Hilda FMM, 36, teaches at Holy Angels Angelo Indian Matriculation Higher Secondary School, Theyagaraya Nagar, Chennai, Tamil Nadu, South India.)