By Hedwig Lewis

Mumbai: The Jesuits are observing an Ignatian Year, May 20, 2021 to July 31, 2022, to celebrate the fifth centenary of the conversion of St Ignatius of Loyola.

On May 20, 1521, while defending the fortress of Pamplona, Spain, in a battle with the invading French army, Saint Ignatius of Loyola (1491-1556) was wounded by a cannon ball … and that literally set the ball rolling for his eventful process of ‘conversion’ to God. The cannonball was instrumental in bringing Ignatius to his knees – but according to God’s designs. The man who had taken a cannonball head on, would rise from the dust and set the world on fire.

Ignatius was raised in a family of great personalities. His father and brothers had won laurels for their military prowess and global enterprises. Stories of their successes and exploits were dinned into Ignatius’ ears day after day, at dinner table and fireside. It was his avowed obligation to carry this heritage forward. He must be his best and do the uttermost to make his family proud, and earn a name for himself.

At the age of 17, he went to Arevalo, and became a member of the family of the Royal Treasurer, Ignatius would continue his education in the arts and cutler, be groomed in courtly manners, and also receive basic military training. The treasurer’s palace contained an immense library with shelves reserved for the trendiest novels of romance/chivalry that were available. Ignatius got hooked on to these thrillers. Ten years later he served as an aide to the Duke of Najera, became a captain of the duke’s army, and eventually assigned to detent the Pamplona fortress

In the latter months of 1521, at Loyola, once the strain and pain of the three surgeries he had undergone to mend the leg wounds he had suffered at the battle in Pamplona began to diminish and his mind was no longer sucked in by suffering, he sorely missed those novels of chivalry and begged to have copies of them so that he could fill the vacant hours in bed.

But to his dismay, none was available. His sister-in-law managed to find just two books in the house: ‘The Flowers of Saints’ and a ‘Life of Christ’, meant for meditative reading and prayer. She tucked them under his pillow, in case he cared to browse through them. Ignatius began to read them, first tentatively, then enthusiastically.

Ignatius was intelligent and observant. He read both books critically, analytically. As he examined the attitudes and actions of the saints, he found several similarities with those of the knights. Both were committed and loyal to their ideals; both vowed allegiance to the commands of their lords/ladies; both enjoyed supernatural intervention and assistance in their struggle again the Evil Forces, and succeeded in vanquishing them.

However, then something curious and confusing happened to Ignatius. Whenever he laid aside the religious books and turned to daydreaming on the tales of chivalry that used to obsess and possess him earlier, his mind seemed to be losing its grip on them. His heroes were becoming less charming and their adventures less thrilling. On the contrary, the challenging life of Christ and egoless dedication of the saints moving out of their comfort zones to embrace intense and fulfilling lives, sounded compelling. While reading these narratives, Ignatius experienced a surge of joy and excitement.

Ignatius revealed in his Autobiography that one fine day, while he was trying to unravel the roots of his mixed-up feelings, “his eyes were opened.” He unravelled the subtle contrasts in the lifestyles of the cavaliers and the saints: hollowness against holiness, restlessness against involvement. The knights were prisoners of their pursuits; the saints enjoyed freedom of spirit. The knights were Dreamers, with their heads in the clouds that drifted with the winds. The saints were Doers, with their hearts rooted in reality, and their deeds bearing abundant fruit shared with those in need. Ignatius realized that his craze of following the knights had now left him with a feeling of emptiness. Should he not join the ranks of the saints?

Over periods of serious discernment and fervent prayer, Ignatius was convinced of what God was challenging him to do. God assured him that he need not change his personality. He had all the qualities of the making of a saint. He only needed to shift his sights from the mundane to the spiritual. If he truly desired God, Ignatius must remove the ‘idols’ that he had treasured for almost three decades and replace these with the Person of Christ. Ignatius did exactly that. He experienced deep spiritual conversion from then on to his dying day. He surrendered himself unconditionally to God, devoted himself tin unreserved service to humanity. His motto: All for the greater glory of God!

(Jesuit Father Hedwig Lewis is the author of “To See All Things New In Christ – Community Reflections and Prayers for the Ignatian Year 2021-2022.” Contact: hedwiglewis@gmail.com)